It's just like the Real World with babies
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
