SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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