So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
