Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Randomize
