You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
