Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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