and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
