Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
