Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize