Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I believe in your delicious
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
