No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
i think my cat just said my name.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
