well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
she pinky promised me she was 18
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
