Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize