I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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