Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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