We named our party play list daddy issues
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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