my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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