The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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