No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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