She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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