For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I have already put on my inside pants.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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