Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
That was before I lit my hair on fire
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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