It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
