Christians are straight up FREAKS
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
