Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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