i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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