He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
