she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
