Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
