Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
