I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Randomize
