Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
