i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You were trust falling into bushes
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
