Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
