yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
