apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
As shirtless as possible
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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