Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
