Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize