have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
