So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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