I cannot find my penis.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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