Dual....:-)
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize