we have officially lost it.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
she smelled like a LAN party
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
