Pappa wants mamma naked
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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