Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
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