I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize