How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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