Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
