She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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