I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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