I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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